Heavenly Muse

Hundred times, believe me , hundred times I have given myself warning  that ENOUGH with complaining, enough with expecting, enough with being hopeful and enough with crying. But every time, I forget about this self-flagellation  and continue the same useless errands in the name of LIFE. May be this feeling of being a looser is also a part of life or may e this is life. This feeling tells you that once you possessed something or at least a hope of possessing something.And this thirst shows that you are alive. No matter how weak, how damaged your hope is, it has long roots and it will never die out. Why? sometime you are tired of being hopeful. Sometime you are just tired of giving justifications.   Damn it!!! This hope will not leave me. And I will witness it getting shattered again.

Yes it is same.Even though you have not traveled the whole world; you have not seen the soil color of different fields  or tasted the water of strange springs sprouting from remote corners; you can make this claim that "The Sky is  the same everywhere". But does the same sky shower the same sort of blessing for every living being? It is another and totally different question. Many, Many (and in fact many) years back when I was small (very small indeed), and used to miss my maternal uncle when he left after spending few holidays with us ; a weird yet effective practice used to heal me in the times of sorrow. I would look at sky and told me rather console myself by thinking that the sky over my head would be the same as the one there over the head of my uncle , so we had something as a connection.  Many years later ( though I was still small but not very ) , my mother died. Life changed and the change brought anxiety . A strong uncomfortable feeling did not let ...

A single lonely silent day, amidst  so many others flourished with daily chores and frequent  sounds of laughter, tells you that how fake and vulnerable your smile is. Silence introduces you with the dark recesses of your mind and many buried thoughts sprout out from hibernation and tickle your wounded conscious.                                                                       sADnESs 

Yes sometime you just can't!!! Can't speak, Can't weep, Can't leave. Everyone gets angry.Everyone gets hyper. Everyone tensed. But when One person says that one hits you ,  scolds you out of anger and its not a big issue then you start thinking about your anger that made you even more silent and passive receptive of abuse. I can't go back.I can't leave. I will move on .I have to. I know one day this journey will end. And I will vanish.

Relations are Relations. Is it that simple ? No. Simply No!!!!!!! Relations have categories to fit in. Which sort of categories? Well I am working on it. But at the start of my research/search , I have found at least  one type which can be known as  " Second Hand relation" .  I have also found(conceived) few characteristics: A relation that you maintain with a person who has to be up to the mark to be in that relationship. A relation that does not accept a person as a person is. A relation that that is devoid of any shade of blind love. A relation which can help you forget the old relations but cannot replace them. (spare part ) A relation that can be clutches but cannot be a lost limb. A relation that is built on inequality. A relation where memories override the living beings. THIS BLOODY SECOND HAND RELATION.